Day 5 ( R1 P3 ) 199.4

I can't believe my weight is stable considering everything that I'm eating. I'm not measuring anything or counting calories but just going with eating when I feel hungry. Yesterday was a *girl's* day out shopping because I received a year end incentive bonus from work. The kids got new sneakers that I would normally never pay that much for and their hair cut. I bought 2 pairs of shoes.

Here's what I ate yesterday:

Breakfast : 2 scrambled egss ( with 1% milk), 2 pieces of bacon, small amount of ketchup

Lunch: small container of chili from Wendy's takeout. I wasn't too sure about the kidney beans but I figured the scale would let me know. Because I think kidney beans are *legumes* and are not alllowed.

Dinner: took the girls to a gourmet burger restaurant called "The Works". I ordered a bunless burger with onions, cheddar, bacon, avacado and mushrooms. When I asked they told me they don't put breadcrumbs or any bbq sauce on the burgers. They have over 200 varieties of toppings that you can have on a burger. For example, you can get one with brie cheese and a sliced pear. The girls had fries and I had a ceasar salad no croutons.

Late night snack: whipped cool whip topping with cashews.

I don't know if I am doing everything right eating-wise. I am simply trying to follow the protocol of *no sugar, no starch*. I check every morning to see if the weight is +/- 1 LIW. Yesterday it was 198,6 and today it's 199.4. I'm just taking it day by day. If you guys have any suggestions or if I'm not doing this right, let me know. Thanks!

Day 3 ( R1 P3) : 199.7

Staying about 1 pound over. I'm not feeling hungry or really looking for food at all. When it's time to eat, I eat because I'm hungry and not because I'm all excited about the opportunity to eat and wantto inhale everything that I possibly can. This is a huge change for me of eating only when I'm hungry and not overeating and I'm hoping it's not just because it's a good time in the hormonal cycle.

I had at the restaurant for my daughter's b-day I had a bunless burger with all the fixings and a bit of ketchup.
Then I had a 45 calorie no sugar fudgsicle and I wasn't sure what would happen but apparently nothing did. It did have some carb grams in it but definitely no sugar (it had malitol) and no starch that I could see on the ingredients.

This morning I had two homemade egg mcmuffin type sandwiches with bacon, egg, cheese and mayo and of course no bread. It was my turn to host the Fri morning breakfast at work and I made 18 egg patties (basically just scrambled eggs in a sprayed small circular tupperware container. I cut up fruit and cheese and tomatoes and lettuce. By 10:30 I was done and drove all the stuff to work and put it in the fridge and then went to the grocery store to pick up a pumpkin pie. I got home close to midnight and went to bed at about 1 am. So I was going non-stop all that time.

Without me knowing, my mom baked a spice cake with cream cheese frosting, an apple coffee cake and a bananna nut bread and put it in my car early this morning and called to let me know it was there. So there was so much food. I received raving compliments and everyone at work really chowed down and thoroughly enjoyed it. Not having any of the desserts did not bother me at all. I was shocked.

For lunch today I met my husband for a "lunch date" and I had rotisserie chicken and caesar salad. I was so full. Haven't had dinner yet but had a handful of almonds. My stomach is feeling a bit better but I feel "greasy" which is hard to explain but I'm going to take Nikki's advice and go to the pharamacy tonight.

I'm really hoping that this feeling of not really caring about eating and not being obsessed about it is not just a fluke and that I can feel like this for all of P3.

Day 2 ( R1 P3) : 199.8

Tried to make the Oopsie rolls. Broke my mixer trying to get the egg whites to make stiff peaks.
It's one of those all in one hand mixers. I'm going to buy a hand mixer with beaters and hopefully that will make a difference. I put the runny batter into muffin cups and they came out all right.

My tummy hurts! I haven't really been that hungry but for breakfast this morning I had egg salad and for lunch I had the cheese and toppings off two pieces of pizza that they sell here at work every Thursday. I ditched the crust.

Today is my middle daughter's 7th birthday. She wants to go out for dinner so I think I'll let them order cake at the restaurant. That way I won't be tempted by having to buy a cake and bring it home and cut it.

I'm having a hard time finding HCG injections from buyers who will ship to Canada. Customs seems to be really cracking down as of late. Not sure why or if it's just for HCG that they're getting more agressive in checking but I don't want to order and have to wait 8 weeks wondering if customs will ever release the parcel or if they will just confiscate it and destroy the contents.

Does anyone have any recommendations for low-carb tortillas?

VLCD 49: 199.2 ( R 1 P 2) Day 2 no injection

Not sure about the weigh-in this morning. I was very quick and had to rush off to write an exam for 8:30. I took the day off and went to write a "situational judgement" test for a job competition with a government department that I applied for. Left the house at 7 am to catch the bus since there would be very limited parking downtown. My two year old was up all night puking with a fever so it took a toll on me and my sleep. My hubby had to stay home this morning from work and he went in the afternoon. We're both sooooo tired today and it's day 2 of TOM so I'm not feeling the greatest.

I am about to make some "Oopsie" rolls now for tomorrow's lunch. Was out of eggs so just sent my hubby to pick some up.

I am extremely nervous about starting P3. I wish I had just a little more leeway with the +/-2 LIW so that I never see the 200 number again. Doing some research and really trying to plan what I'm going to eat on P3 so that I don't get distracted and off track.

VLCD 47: 198.6 ( R1 P2)

WOW! 198.6. I have not seen below 200 in at least 17 years. It's funny- when I look in the mirror I still see the same person. I need to change that. I think the vision I had in my head even when I was as big as 269 in the year 2000 was of a much smaller person - the image in my head didn't match reality. I only realized how big I was when I saw a pic of myself and then quickly got rid of the pic or hid it away. Then I just kept on eating and wishing I could be thin.

There's a lot of emotions that come withreaching this new territory. A big fear is not being able to keep the weight off and regaining. I have a LOT of stress in my life - work, finances, marital relationship issues that need to be worked out but it feels like conquering the weight is the best thing that I can do for myself first and then maybe everthing else will get easier from there.

This morning was my last injection. I am thinking of possibly continuing P2 for a bit longer with the homeopathic drops that I ordered back in January that were held up in customs for so long but arrived after I had ordered the injections. It doesn't appear that I have become immune so it's just something that I'm considering. I would like to have a little more of a threshold between the +/- 2 LIW. I don't want to ever see the 200 number again. Will decide soon - I've been reading some blogs where people do continue with the drops but I know my body will soon need a break and a move to P3. I've been looking foward to having cheese for a while now. It's been a long haul but so worth it. Knowing that I only have less than 50 pounds to go is such a good feeling. It's manageable. I don't think I would ever be able to reach less than 150 but 150 at 5'4 is a good ideal weight for me to strive for.

VLCD 46: 200.9 ( R1 P2 )

The scale freaked me out this morning. When I first stepped on, it said "199.6" I thought WTH??? I was so happy. I pulled my pj's back on and ran downstairs to get my camera because I wanted a pic of my first long-awaited milestone. When I came back up and weighed again, it said 200.9. I never trust the first display the scales gives me. Every morning I check it three times and then move it to another spot and try another two times just to be sure. So it repetitively said "200.9". I'll accept that but am leaving my camera on the counter in the bathroom just so I can be prepared.

I went to a potluck this morning at 11am for my daughter's year-end ringette get-together. I brought a greek salad with chicken ( I bought it from a Greek restaurant) and a plate of bakery bought chocolate chip cookies. I took the cookies out of the container and piled them onto a nice glass bevelled plate so it would look like they were home-made. I wanted to look like I had put some effort in even though the only effort was sending my husband to the bakery counter at the grocery store. I took some salad out of the bowl before we went to the potluck and put it into a small glass tupperware. I wanted to make sure I had something to eat there and didn't want to touch the salad once I put the Greek vinigrette dressing on it just it case it had sugar in it. So I ate that with some Walden Farms dressing and picked at the veggie platter there and had a few spoonfuls of chilli. I think that was a mistake because as we were leaving I had the worst stomach cramps and had to drive over the speed limit just to get home in time to rush to the bathroom. Sorry - TMI. But that concerned me that my body would react that way.

So looking forward to seeing what the scales says tomorrow. My last injection day is tomorrow. 47 days has been a long haul....

VLCD 45: 202 ( R1 P2 )

I'm keepin' on truckin'. I was a little concerned if I would gain anything today because last night we had St. Hubert's take-out rotisserie chicken. (It's a Canadian franchise). I took all the skin off but didn't weight the chicken breast. Then before I knew it I had eaten the coleslaw. I didn't even think about. I looked up the nutritional value on their website and there's very little sugar in it so I think that's why I didn't gain. Unless a gain is waiting to show up tomorrow?? But I'm happy with the 202. Only 3 pounds to go to reach the first milestone.

Just curious if anyone had the post-pregnancy stomach and if it just shrunk and flattened as you lost more weight. I notice that yes, my stomach has definitely reduced but the fat/skin is getting very soft and loose and wrinkly looking. Will this ever go away??