VLCD 47: 198.6 ( R1 P2)

WOW! 198.6. I have not seen below 200 in at least 17 years. It's funny- when I look in the mirror I still see the same person. I need to change that. I think the vision I had in my head even when I was as big as 269 in the year 2000 was of a much smaller person - the image in my head didn't match reality. I only realized how big I was when I saw a pic of myself and then quickly got rid of the pic or hid it away. Then I just kept on eating and wishing I could be thin.

There's a lot of emotions that come withreaching this new territory. A big fear is not being able to keep the weight off and regaining. I have a LOT of stress in my life - work, finances, marital relationship issues that need to be worked out but it feels like conquering the weight is the best thing that I can do for myself first and then maybe everthing else will get easier from there.

This morning was my last injection. I am thinking of possibly continuing P2 for a bit longer with the homeopathic drops that I ordered back in January that were held up in customs for so long but arrived after I had ordered the injections. It doesn't appear that I have become immune so it's just something that I'm considering. I would like to have a little more of a threshold between the +/- 2 LIW. I don't want to ever see the 200 number again. Will decide soon - I've been reading some blogs where people do continue with the drops but I know my body will soon need a break and a move to P3. I've been looking foward to having cheese for a while now. It's been a long haul but so worth it. Knowing that I only have less than 50 pounds to go is such a good feeling. It's manageable. I don't think I would ever be able to reach less than 150 but 150 at 5'4 is a good ideal weight for me to strive for.