“Set Yourself Free” by Ralph Marston"

---"There is no outside force holding you back. You are holding you back and you are blaming it on someone or something else. The way you are able to continue holding yourself back is by maintaining the illusion that you're a victim. Once you realize that illusion, you will naturally and easily move forward. In fact, it is easier to fulfill your best possibilities than it is to avoid them. So let go of the blame and watch the limitations drop away. Certainly there will always be challenges that hold you back. For each challenge provides you with a pathway through which you can move toward fulfillment. It is your very nature to accomplish. Lovingly accept your destiny, and allow that accomplishment to be manifest through you. Set yourself free to follow your purpose. Set yourself free to truly live."

Saturday, May 1, 2010

Day 18 ( R1 P3 ) : 201.0

I decided to join Overeaters Anonymous. I am going to do the tele-call first just to listen and then I will attend the first meeting next week. I am a little unsure of how much of a "religious" stance they have in this group. Each group is different obviously because of the participants. I was raised a practicing Catholic but I don't want the meetings to be religious. I will see what happens and if this is not for me, I will investigate other avenues. I am looking for a venue where I can vent my inner thoughts about how being fat has caused me to not make the best decisions and reasons why I gained weight in the first place.

My last day of P3 will be Tuesday and then I am considering going back to P2 or maybe just continuing on P3 for another week or 2. I have not been able to find a company that will sell HCG injections to Canada anymore. They all say that Customs has really cracked down lately and parcels are being returned to them or confiscated and it's just not worth their hassle anymore. I do have a bottle of HCG drops that I ordered way back when in January and it took more than 8 weeks to arrive. So I think my R2P2 will be with the drops. They have been sitting in a cupboard above my microwave since then so I hope they are still potent. The expiry date is sometime in 2011 or 12.

Everyone seems to be doing great lately and really staying strong on whatever phase of the protocol you are at. Congrats to everyone!


  1. I hope OA is the right fit for you, but if not, know we're here for you. You can vent and work out the emotional/psychological reasoning behind your need to over eat here and you're safe. :) We're all dealing with this to one degree or another.

    I think because you are so close to the 200 mark, it may be extra stressful to you because you can so easily (and normally) bounce between being above that line and below it. I would go the recommended amount of time between rounds and start again in order to get further from that line and that stress. It IS just a number. You have made such strides and have been SO successful... but that 200 line can wreak havoc on your psyche.

    Hang in there!

  2. I second everything that helderheid said- She's absolutely right. Its taken me 3 rounds now to get down below the 200 mark. It will happen for you! Lots of hugs to you-